The memories of my husband
I couldnt post thisa comment, as lj has a limit.
I remember when I first met pouchhopper. I was living in plymouth with my then mate revvy rabbit. Pouchhopper was in another relationship, was working on a bunch of amazing fursuits and was managing to squeeze it all in between his job schedual. he was such a bright wonderful person. I almost cried the day I met him, to believe such a soul existed in this or any other world was unreal to me. It wasnt long after that that he injured his back at work, and was fired after he was set to go to the hospital for surgery. He was angry with his employer, but I was going through some tough times with the recent loss of my mother, he would always put aside his pain to sit and listen, he never gave status quo advice, it was always honest and sometimes brutal, and he would dish it out as a father to a son, even though our age diffrences were not that great. he was 30 years old.
I had just turned I believe 20. As the days moved on, his relationship took some rocky turns, and still he would open his ears and his heart to me when I need him, the pains from his injuries only getting worse as time went on, but that loving smile that you could hear in a phone conversation never changed. I felt terrible at times with how much I soaked his shoulder over our conversations on the internet. I'd even lend him an open ear so he could let down his guard about his life and his situations. even with everything that happened, he would still smile everyday.
by 2004 I had decided to move to california for a short time to come and meet him, I remember pulling up infront of his house, he was standing in the front lawn with a cigar in his muzzle, and a cane in his paw, a hose in the other. we said very little at first, I showed up dressed as usual outlandishly, he opened his arms and hugged me tightly, then invited me back into his garage which had been converted into a small fursuit workshop. we sat and talked for what must have been hours before I met his mother.
She herself was a wonderful woman, warm and careing, and every bit as southern as I was (I spent my developmental years in the south, losing the twang overtime) she came out to ask pouch to come back inside, she was a timly person who loved all of pouches friends, and we never gave a huff about her house rules becasue we respected her so much. over time I learned that he was taking care of her, even with the lawsuit he was in against his former employer, and spending time making fursuits and plushies for friends. it was a short visit, maybe a few months. but I spent every moment I could with him. we could always make eachother smile.
Not long after that trip, I had another set of events in my life that really sent me on a downward spiral, he was there to catch me, it was now 2005 and after everythingcame to pass, I gathered up the courage to ask him to be my mate. his acceptance left me speachless, the idea that someone so beautiful would accept, well I was in tears.
Shortly there after I moved back to california, unfortunately pouchhoppers body was in far worse shape than before. but even with that, he still greeted me with the same warm smile every day I saw him. his story was heroic in my eyes. I stayed by his side, providing him the shoulder he needed to keep pushing through life the very same he had given to me.
after finding him a better attorney, we found out that he had a tumor on his spine, and it was growing rapidly, so in late 2006 he went in for surgery to have it removed. as they wheeled him out of surgery, he was still under the influence of several pain killers and other drugs, iv's and bags all over the place, he still looked up into my eyes with a smile and with a moment of keen wit, he said to me "well my joey, I just gave birth to our first baby, 9 lbs" refering to the size of the tumor. he then proceeded to look around himself and smile, even giggle a bit. it was the first time he called me his guardian angel. becasue of the fast action of the new lawyers he found a new doctor that not only identified the tumor, but demanded that it be removed. he then told me something he didnt even want to tell me until after the surgery, the doctor had given him 3 months to live if the tumor had not been removed, he didnt want me or anyone else to worry about him anymore than they already did.
It was also around that time in which I had asked him to marry me. It wasnt as romantic as I had hoped for, but it never comes out the way you plan. I had this amazing speach I was going to give to him, about how inspireing he had been all throughout our lives, and how I wanted him to know how much I truely loved him, no matter how bad a shape he was in. It got shorteded t "pouchhopper, when we started this relationship I told you for rich or poor, sickness and health, I would stay by your side, never to leave you, I'd like to ask you to marry me, if you'll give me such an honor"
We planned the wedding, it wasnt easy, vows were written and hidden from eachother of course. places were chosen, and the excitement grew as the big day neared. it was the weekend after FC, we expected a larger turnout but realized that we planned it right after everyones finances were drained, and ofcourse the con crud was making its rounds.
2 the ranting gryphon flew in just for the wedding and reception the ceremony was pulled together with the help of all of my friends and even waggs family. I remember walking to the park in a huge line, all of the fursuiters were in full suit. kids and parents were out in thier yards, it was even raining a little, so the temperature was nice and coolwe walked down the isles and had our friends read the vows. we stayed quiet in suit, I was stitched in tightly. this was something pouch had always dreamed of doing.
It wasnt long after that we got a notice from the doctor, pouch was diagnosed with scoliosis, and was told that his tumor might be returning. they sent him in for a number of bloodtest as well, he never told me why. even then, even with the doctor telling him that he was going to be in a chair within the next 5 to 10 years he still kept pushing with a smile, that same childish enthusiastic smile he had the day I met him. he had his off days but he never gave up hope.
I will never forget you mommaroo, always remember your joey loves you.